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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
 Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:09:07
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How are you guys at giving advice? I think I may have really annoyed a Christian friend of mine (not intentionally).
If you don't give advice, or at least a shoulder to cry on, okay, don't respond.
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@tomic
Administrator
USA
4607 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:13:19 [Permalink]
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We can always try ; )
More specifics would be necessary though.
@tomic
Gravity, not just a good idea...it's the law! |
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:29:45 [Permalink]
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quote:
We can always try ; )
More specifics would be necessary though.
@tomic
Gravity, not just a good idea...it's the law!
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:37:36 [Permalink]
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A friend of mine has a very religeous wife. He recently PCS'd to another state. She's been sending me a lot of bible-thumping e-mail. He knows I'm an Atheist. For a while, I just hit the "del" button. Last week, she sent me a joke. (I'll always open jokes). It was a rather vile Atheist joke. If I sent a joke making fun of christians, I would be considered -ist something! Anyway, I wrote to my friend and suggested (yes, nicely) that wasn't too cool.
Now I haven't heard from him, but the glurge continues from her almost daily.
This guy was my sponsor when I got here to Ellsworth back in '96. We've been to the desert together. Should I use AOL tools and block e-mail?
I'd rather we'd remain friends, but I'm a little tired of being attacked every time I open my e-mail.
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@tomic
Administrator
USA
4607 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:41:14 [Permalink]
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It's no fun when this sort of thing happens, but you had every right to mention that maybe you weren't the person to be sending that stuff to. There's just nothing wrong with asking a person to stop. I wouldn't go as far as blocking email unless you are thoroughly done with it and don't wish to communicate with this person again.
@tomic
Gravity, not just a good idea...it's the law! |
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:46:18 [Permalink]
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You're right. I saw him pop up on my "buddy list" today, but was too much of a wimp of IM him. Next time I guess I will. If he tells me to !@#$ off, I'll just cut my losses, but it will hurt.
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@tomic
Administrator
USA
4607 Posts |
Posted - 04/15/2001 : 00:48:46 [Permalink]
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That's really about all you can do in this or many other related situations. I hope it works out for you.
@tomic
Gravity, not just a good idea...it's the law! |
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Slater
SFN Regular
USA
1668 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2001 : 12:38:10 [Permalink]
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quote:
If he tells me to !@#$ off, I'll just cut my losses, but it will hurt.
Way too many atheists have been intimidated for way too long, and have accepted the bigotry we endure as par for the course. Lisa these people are cretins, they are not your friends. Tell this Bozo to !@#$ off. You are just as good (if not better) than she is. Write her husband off too. His silence is endorsement enough of her rudeness.
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2001 : 12:46:30 [Permalink]
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Surprise, surprise. I just got an e-mail from her this morning. A nice long apology. Yes, I was just about to write them both off, but if she can suck it up and apologize, I can certainly accept.
While she and I certainly don't agree with respect to religon, I'm not going to bust up a five year friendship over it. Hmm, maybe I should forward our e-mails to the parts of the world who believe religeous discusstions should include rocket launchers.
Lisa
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Slater
SFN Regular
USA
1668 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2001 : 17:01:07 [Permalink]
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quote:
I just got an e-mail from her this morning. A nice long apology. Yes, I was just about to write them both off, but if she can suck it up and apologize, I can certainly accept.
Really? Why?
Does she intend to never make bigoted remarks about Atheists again, or just not to you?
Why did she say these things to begin with if she had known you for five years?
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 04/17/2001 : 18:04:42 [Permalink]
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No, she's the type who "Urban Legends" site os a favorite target. She'll forward any damn thing that gets in her in-box. I guess she has me on some sort of "gang mail" list, and never thought before she hit "send".
Reminds me of a sweet old biddy who was a friend of my mom's. She was the same way. I sent her the snopes.com address and then didn't hear from her for nearly a week.
(If you've been to "skeptic News", you'll find out I fell for the one about xmas plants".) Seems she went through the whole site! Now I get nice letters instead of "gang flashing headlights" type of crap. I think my young friend has learned her lesson. Know your audience. Her husband explained to her that if I had turned the joke around where a christian had "got it" in the end, she would have been offended.
Now that her husband has explained to her our religeous differences, I will admit that I'm surprised she still wants to remain friends. Let's be real, how many Atheists have ever received an apology from a Christian?
I'll wait..........
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ljbrs
SFN Regular
USA
842 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2001 : 20:17:47 [Permalink]
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Lisa (and others):
I have been a non-believer and a skeptic all of my life (as far back as I can remember). I simply saw through all of the attempts to proselytize me. It is very difficult to understand the hatred that people of other religions (in this case, Christian) have about us. I have taken to saying that I believe that whatever exists, exists, and that I would consider it blasphemous to think otherwise. Then I always change the subject. I know that there is absolutely no way of changing anybody else's mind. Religious people usually have been proselytized from childhood about a particular religion as being the one and only true faith and about the horrors which would come from believing otherwise. These poor souls cannot help it. Their religion is ingrained in their very being through such early proselytization. To approach them with ideas which go counter to their cherished beliefs is taken as an affront. I find my way of doing it kinder and gentler. True believers usually leave me alone about religion since I am not completely threatening to their beliefs. After all, they may think that their religion is the one which "is" and is therefore in agreement with mine.
That may sound as a copout. However, I have feelings for these poor, gentle souls who are fearful of confronting anything which goes counter to their cherished lifelong-held beliefs.
I learned, early on, at three years of age, that telling a five-year-old friend that Santa Claus did not exist was very hurtful to her, even though the act of using my mind was absolutely exhiliarating and exciting to me. I never forget the expression in her eyes -- pure horror!
Give "true believers" time. The ones who will change, will change. The others are beyond help. The information is out there. True believers are exceedingly fearful of burning in hell (or some other such nonsense).
ljbrs
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