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Randy
SFN Regular
USA
1990 Posts |
Posted - 04/19/2009 : 07:33:18
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...on a silver platter....
Scuba-diving'Satanists'hack off arms of submerged Jesus statue.
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"We are all connected; to each other biologically, to the earth chemically, to the rest of the universe atomically."
"So you're made of detritus [from exploded stars]. Get over it. Or better yet, celebrate it. After all, what nobler thought can one cherish than that the universe lives within us all?" -Neil DeGrasse Tyson |
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Randy
SFN Regular
USA
1990 Posts |
Posted - 04/19/2009 : 07:53:14 [Permalink]
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Story title reads like a old DC Comicbook cover. Follow-up in the series...."Scuba-diving Satanists crawl from the sewers of New York City. Run away, run away! |
"We are all connected; to each other biologically, to the earth chemically, to the rest of the universe atomically."
"So you're made of detritus [from exploded stars]. Get over it. Or better yet, celebrate it. After all, what nobler thought can one cherish than that the universe lives within us all?" -Neil DeGrasse Tyson |
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Simon
SFN Regular
USA
1992 Posts |
Posted - 04/19/2009 : 10:25:00 [Permalink]
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How in the fuck do they conclude that Satanists did that?
All they know if that the hands are missing, probably stolen. What are their ground to accuse Satanists? That's insulting and bigoted! |
Look again at that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there – on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam. Carl Sagan - 1996 |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 04/19/2009 : 13:20:33 [Permalink]
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Yeah right. Blame the Satanists, why the hell not? and if there are no Satanists to be found, surely they can root out an atheist or two. I dunno why they didn't think of the godless first. If it were me, I'd look for links to a collector of and/or dealer in religious objects. Those are rife around the Med and many if not most are scoundrels to one degree or another -- the James Ossuary is an example of how they work.
So what's to be done with Abysmal Christ now? Will they haul him ashore and fit him with prosthetics? We shall see......
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Edited by - filthy on 04/19/2009 13:22:15 |
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HalfMooner
Dingaling
Philippines
15831 Posts |
Posted - 04/19/2009 : 17:39:06 [Permalink]
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I couldn't beat such thoughtful journalism with a spoof.
I'm just glad that almost nonexistent satanist theists were blamed instead of atheists. The most likely suspects, I think, are fishermen using drag nets. You can bet that they wouldn't want to report finding Jesus' arms when they pulled in their net.
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“Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive. |
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