|
HalfMooner
Dingaling
Philippines
15831 Posts |
 Posted - 05/27/2009 : 11:45:00
|
Read The Onion's original story here.God Cites 'Moving In Mysterious Ways' As Motive In Killing Of 3,000 Papua New Guineans
July 29, 1998 | Issue 33•26
VANIMO, PAPUA NEW GUINEA—In His first official statement since the July 17 tsunami that claimed the lives of an estimated 3,000 Papua New Guineans, the Lord announced Monday that He killed the island villagers as part of His longtime "moving in mysterious ways" policy, calling the natural disaster "part of My unknowable, divine plan for mankind."
"Though the need for such a tidal wave is incomprehensible to you mortals, flawed as you are by sin, I can assure you that I had a very good reason for what I did," God said of the disaster, whose death toll is expected to climb to 5,000 once the effects of disease, starvation and marauding crocodiles become known. "Trust me."
. . .
|
|
“Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive. |
|
God Cites 'Moving In Mysterious Ways' In Killings
