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HalfMooner
Dingaling
Philippines
15831 Posts |
 Posted - 08/26/2009 : 18:32:16
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Washington, DC, August 26 (PNN) -- Chaos ensued today after the Almighty instructed Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, and fifty-five million other members of the GOP to run for President of the United States.
Brian Moran and Ed Schmeizner campaign, as
Republican candidates rally across America
Millions of 2012 Republican presidential candidates flocked to public places to harangue Democrats, stray dogs, independents and one another. Millions of screaming GOP candidates demanded original birth certificates from one another. Fist fights and gun battles soon broke out as the God-approved potential Presidents quickly ran out of campaign rhetoric and turned to direct action against their opponents.
Congressional Democrats in both the Senate and House of Representatives suddenly found themselves in undisputed control. The Democrats completed and passed comprehensive health care reform in just two hours. President Obama signed the legislation within minutes of its approval.
Reports of heavy violence were coming in from much of the United States. Yahweh, Lord God Almighty released a press statement:
"Indeed, I, the great Deity of the Jews, Christians and Muslims, have anointed each and every Republican as my personal, exclusive choice for President of the United States in the 2012 election year. Frankly, I've grown tired of all the Republican politicians and television talking heads taking liberties in My name. Several have said they'll run for President just as soon as they got inspiration from Me. (As if they'd ever say that I told them they were too stupid for the office!) Well, now they -- and all the other Republicans -- have My endorsement. They can sort this out for themselves, tooth and claw. I'm making Myself some popcorn. This should be as much fun as watching evolution in action."
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“Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive. |
Edited by - HalfMooner on 08/28/2009 21:29:19
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God commands all Republicans to run for President
