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Valiant Dancer
Forum Goalie
USA
4826 Posts |
 Posted - 08/31/2009 : 20:19:23 [Permalink]
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1) What to you think about funerals in general?
They are supposed to be for the living to remeber the person who has passed and grieve. However, there are some rituals that have arisen in the funerary process which are inherently absurd.
Viewing of the corpse. Lord and Lady as my witness, if I hear "they are so lifelike" and it's not immediately followed by "Oh my God, they're moving" I'm gonna get violent. No, they don't look lifelike. They are dead, stiff shells that used to hold a loved one dressed up with makeup.
Having those who are closest to the person have cargo. This one struck me when I was asked to be pallbearer for my girlfriend this past April. So, not only was I torn up inside with grief, but I also had a responsibility to move the shell (in a really heavy box) to the place they were gonna plant it.
2)What to you think about the funeral industry in America?
The words "jackals" and "vultures" leaps to mind, but I wouldn't want to insult the jackals or vultures. Noble critters that they are because they actually serve a useful purpose.
In some cases, they push embalming. They have been known to insist that embalming is required by law. (it isn't.)
My own funerary plans are quite simple.
After my death, the organ harvesters show up and take anything I'm done with. What is left goes on the cookie sheet and into the fire it goes. (no embalming) A simple container is used to transport the ashes to the forest preserve where they are sprinkled. (after obtaining the proper permissions and permits) The memorial service is a simple affair with music, rememberances, and focus on the living. I hope it'll be a damn good party with laughter as well as tears.
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Cthulhu/Asmodeus when you're tired of voting for the lesser of two evils
Brother Cutlass of Reasoned Discussion |
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BigPapaSmurf
SFN Die Hard
3192 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2009 : 06:03:27 [Permalink]
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All right...can we have your liver then?
Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour,
That's orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned,
A sun that is the source of all our power.
The sun and you and me and all the stars that we can see
Are moving at a million miles a day
In an outer spiral arm, at forty thousand miles an hour,
Of the galaxy we call the 'Milky Way'.
Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars.
It's a hundred thousand light years side to side.
It bulges in the middle, sixteen thousand light years thick,
But out by us, it's just three thousand light years wide.
We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point.
We go 'round every two hundred million years,
And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions
In this amazing and expanding universe.
The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding
In all of the directions it can whizz
As fast as it can go, at the speed of light, you know,
Twelve million miles a minute, and that's the fastest speed there is.
So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth.
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"...things I have neither seen nor experienced nor heard tell of from anybody else; things, what is more, that do not in fact exist and could not ever exist at all. So my readers must not believe a word I say." -Lucian on his book True History
"...They accept such things on faith alone, without any evidence. So if a fraudulent and cunning person who knows how to take advantage of a situation comes among them, he can make himself rich in a short time." -Lucian critical of early Christians c.166 AD From his book, De Morte Peregrini |
| Edited by - BigPapaSmurf on 09/01/2009 06:25:35 |
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marfknox
SFN Die Hard
USA
3739 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2009 : 06:22:23 [Permalink]
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BPS wrote: | All right...can we have your liver then? |
When he's done with it! ;-) |
"Too much certainty and clarity could lead to cruel intolerance" -Karen Armstrong
Check out my art store: http://www.marfknox.etsy.com
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astropin
SFN Regular
USA
970 Posts |
Posted - 09/01/2009 : 09:14:57 [Permalink]
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| Ah yes....."the meaning of life"...classic. |
I would rather face a cold reality than delude myself with comforting fantasies.
You are free to believe what you want to believe and I am free to ridicule you for it.
Atheism:
The result of an unbiased and rational search for the truth.
Infinitus est numerus stultorum |
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Trish
SFN Addict
USA
2102 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2009 : 14:57:54 [Permalink]
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| Told my kid to have me cremated and interred at Ft Logan if she thought it necessary to have some place to go after I'm gone. Total cost to her about $500 for the cremation. Interment and burial costs - sorry taxpayers. Cremation is required at Ft Logan, they don't do burials. Can have my other half carved on the back side of the marker stone and be buried in the same hole in the ground. Then told her that what ever she wanted as far as 'services'/wake etc. It is for her to mourn in her way not for me to determine. So she asked if she could have a party. Go figure - she is my kid after all. |
...no one has ever found a 4.5 billion year old stone artifact (at the right geological stratum) with the words "Made by God."
No Sense of Obligation by Matt Young
"Say what you will about the sweet miracle of unquestioning faith. I consider the capacity for it terrifying and vile!"
Mother Night by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
They (Women Marines) don't have a nickname, and they don't need one. They get their basic training in a Marine atmosphere, at a Marine Post. They inherit the traditions of the Marines. They are Marines.
LtGen Thomas Holcomb, USMC
Commandant of the Marine Corps, 1943
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R.Wreck
SFN Regular
USA
1191 Posts |
Posted - 09/02/2009 : 15:32:59 [Permalink]
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Woke up this morning
Put on my slippers
Walked in the kitchen and died
And oh what a feeling!
When my soul
Went thru the ceiling
And on up into heaven I did ride
When I got there they did say
John, it happened this way
You slipped upon the floor
And hit your head
And all the angels say
Just before you passed away
These were the very last words
That you said:
Please don't bury me
Down in that cold cold ground
No, I'd druther have "em" cut me up
And pass me all around
Throw my brain in a hurricane
And the blind can have my eyes
And the deaf can take both of my ears
If they don't mind the size
Give my stomach to Milwaukee
If they run out of beer
Put my socks in a cedar box
Just get 'em out of here
Venus de Milo can have my arms
Look out! I've got your nose
Sell my heart to the junkman
And give my love to Rose
Give my feet to the footloose
Careless, fancy free
Give my knees to the needy
Don't pull that stuff on me
Hand me down my walking cane
It's a sin to tell a lie
Send my mouth way down south
And kiss my ass goodbye
-John Prine, Please Don't Bury Me |
The foundation of morality is to . . . give up pretending to believe that for which there is no evidence, and repeating unintelligible propositions about things beyond the possibliities of knowledge.
T. H. Huxley
The Cattle Prod of Enlightened Compassion
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2009 : 01:40:36 [Permalink]
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I am planning to make my own funerary urn. I do this as a precaution because some unscrupulous undertakers only have one coffin and reuse it endlessly. The same might hold true with urns, no? I really should get started on that soon....
Funerary practices through the ages are an interesting study. Many of them are quite beautiful and some are downright disgusting, and some just take too damned long -- like when a pope or a pharaoh, or some other big-time lout croaks. Neandertal Man ceremonially buried their dead and all aboriginal cultures do the same, albeit not necessarily underground.
Me, I'd kind of like my ashes dumped into the New River Gorge. It's not really that big of a deal, though. The kids can do as they will with them.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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| Edited by - filthy on 09/03/2009 01:43:58 |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
 Posted - 09/15/2009 : 03:00:36 [Permalink]
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Best funeral ever! I wish it could be done this Way here.
Found it at PZ's. Open the link if you dare.
Edit: The vulture is the Eurasian Griffon, ( Gyps fulvus.)
I confess, I had to look that one up. In doing so, I found this.
Sky burial
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This article is about the Tibetan practice. |
Much more complete than the one from the porn site (and some might make unkind speculations as to how PZ came by it). 
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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| Edited by - filthy on 09/15/2009 03:50:10 |
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bngbuck
SFN Addict
USA
2437 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2009 : 11:31:35 [Permalink]
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Filthy......
Wonderful post! Gives back to some of the lower animals what man has routinely taken from their brothers and sisters since the beginning.
In a Western world environment, this type of disposal of human waste would be ideal -- after any possible organ harvesting -- and a great assist to underprivileged and undernourished carnivores.
Perhaps in a Brave New World, there will be more animals eating humans and fewer humans eating animals. From time to time, I've contemplated what fun it would be to teach gorillas how to use an AK-47 and then heavily arm our cousins in the Congo. I would then fund a hunting safari for Ted Nugent to go bag primates in Africa with his bow and arrow.
Of course they're herbivores, but the apes could leave the carrion to the lions who would be happy to complete the carbon cycle! |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 09/15/2009 : 11:52:32 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by bngbuck
Filthy......
Wonderful post! Gives back to some of the lower animals what man has routinely taken from their brothers and sisters since the beginning.
In a Western world environment, this type of disposal of human waste would be ideal -- after any possible organ harvesting -- and a great assist to underprivileged and undernourished carnivores.
Perhaps in a Brave New World, there will be more animals eating humans and fewer humans eating animals. From time to time, I've contemplated what fun it would be to teach gorillas how to use an AK-47 and then heavily arm our cousins in the Congo. I would then fund a hunting safari for Ted Nugent to go bag primates in Africa with his bow and arrow.
Of course they're herbivores, but the apes could leave the carrion to the lions who would be happy to complete the carbon cycle!
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Give back to the earth as the earth has given to you. The Tibetans have the right idea, as have many aboriginal cultures.
I would, if I could, finance Nugent to hunt corporate Republican lobbyists in DC and lend him my own AK-47 for the safari.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Agita
Skeptic Friend
USA
58 Posts |
Posted - 09/16/2009 : 05:00:52 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by astropin
1)What to you think about funerals in general?
2)What to you think about the funeral industry in America?
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My first thought on funerals is, as much as I like you I'd rather go to yours than mine.
But seriously, I think Jazz Funerals are pretty cool. They play dirges on the march to the grave and then play upbeat swing type music on the way back. I really dig the irreverent factor. Also I hear Irish wakes can last for days.
I was 33 when my Dad died and I had never been to a funeral before and I wish I hadn't gone to his. Of all the wonderful time I spent with him the image of him lying in that coffin is the one in my mind. To this day if the coffin is open I refuse to enter the funeral parlor. I have made my preference quite clear that I do not want my dead carcass displayed. I don't want to be remembered that way.
As far as the Funeral Industry, I guess it's no better or worse than any other industry.
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Your thoughts on funerals
