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 Rival Popes set to debate
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/03/2007 :  16:40:04  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
First Papal Debate Set for Wednesday

Schenectady, New York (CP) -- This small city is preparing for fireworks as competing claimants to the Throne of Saint Peter get ready for a battle papal at Union College's Nott Memorial Theater.


Michael I, the first Geek Pope.

Sponsored by television station WRGB and the League of Women Conclavists, a debate will be held on Wednesday, featuring two claimants to the Papacy, Michael I and Pius XIII.


Pius XIII, attending his
flock (not pictured).

The impending debate is being promoted as The Pugilism of the Pretenders, The Siege of the See, The Clash of the Claimants, and The Schism in Schenectady.


Pope Michael I, grants a papal
audience to Dutch cable TV

Both Popes are rural Americans. Pope Michael I, born David Bawden, brings his Kansas youth to the match at age 48. Michael I has a world-wide following of over forty followers. His opponent, Pope Pius XIII, aka Lucian Pulvermacher of Washington State, brings the wily experience of 89 years, and a flock of nearly two dozen devoted followers (some of them not actual sheep) to the bout.


White smoke from the Sistine
Chapel in Montana announced
Pius XIII's election as Pope.





Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.

Edited by - HalfMooner on 06/04/2007 12:27:23

JEROME DA GNOME
BANNED

2418 Posts

Posted - 06/03/2007 :  19:18:19   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send JEROME DA GNOME a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Will this be televised?

When and where?

Woo-Hoo pope debate.

I'll bring the wine and crackers!


What a man believes upon grossly insufficient evidence is an index into his desires -- desires of which he himself is often unconscious. If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way. - Bertrand Russell
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/03/2007 :  20:12:46   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by JEROME DA GNOME

Will this be televised?

When and where?

Woo-Hoo pope debate.

I'll bring the wine and crackers!

Jerome, this is an area where I have been allowed by SFN's Admins to post lies, woo-woo, and little else, in the Quixotic pursuit of satire and parody. In this example, as is so often the case, the funny parts (the details and photos of the two Popes) are all for real, with only the unfunny framework of the debate being false. As usual, I simply steal from reality for all the best, most hilariously implausible, bits.

So even if you live in Schenectady, you won't be able to flip to WRGB and see the debate, come Wednesday. Sorry. It would have been a hoot, however.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26022 Posts

Posted - 06/03/2007 :  22:35:36   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I was disappointed that there wasn't more background on the two Popes and why they felt entitled to the Popehood, anyway.

I was hoping, as I began reading, to hear that some prominent psychic had predicted Benedict's demise.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  00:16:06   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Dave, I left the Wiki links to explain why both of these guys might think they are Pope, or to aspire to Pontifitude. But it might indeed have been better to have detailed that background here. After listening to Filthy, I tend to want to err on the side of brevity. But I'll take your criticism seriously.

I personally found the photos hilarious in themselves. They look like hostage photos of kidnapped Pontiffs. Michael I in his cramped attic computer room and sitting on his rustic porch, and Pius XIII with the more subtle wire fence behind him. And the white smoke from Pius XIII's Montana "Sistine Chapel" cabin is just precious.

They each have the right dresses, but a fancy gown won't get the unpopular girl a date to the Prom.

But best of all are the solemnly serious faces of these poor nobodies in Pope dresses.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
Edited by - HalfMooner on 06/04/2007 00:20:49
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  05:09:37   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Me, I'da tossed in La Papessa and tried for a three-way.



Having read much of the history of the Papacy, I have come to the conclusion that it is not possible to write bullshit about it. The pure facts are far more outrageous than anything even my wrecked mind could dream up, so 'mooner's story is perfectly reasonable.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26022 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  10:36:07   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I missed the links.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  12:25:44   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dave W.

I missed the links.
I will highlight them by bolding.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26022 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  13:32:15   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
It may have just been me.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  13:45:03   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
When an editor, an editor, misses something, perhaps it's too well hidden.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26022 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  14:37:37   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
It may just have been too early in the morning when I read it. I didn't comment until later on in the day.

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  16:30:01   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by Dave W.

It may just have been too early in the morning when I read it. I didn't comment until later on in the day.
That I fully understand. I always recommend that people calling me with thoughtful discussions try again in the evening, when I have a full half of my wits. They don't listen, but They Were Warned.


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.
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JEROME DA GNOME
BANNED

2418 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  20:07:35   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send JEROME DA GNOME a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Will the debate be in Latin to prevent the common people from understanding what they are saying?


What a man believes upon grossly insufficient evidence is an index into his desires -- desires of which he himself is often unconscious. If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way. - Bertrand Russell
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marfknox
SFN Die Hard

USA
3739 Posts

Posted - 06/04/2007 :  20:36:55   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit marfknox's Homepage  Send marfknox an AOL message Send marfknox a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Jerome wrote:
Will the debate be in Latin to prevent the common people from understanding what they are saying?
I don't think they listen any better when it's in their native language.

Christianity uses that sheep metaphor for a reason, yo yo.

"Too much certainty and clarity could lead to cruel intolerance" -Karen Armstrong

Check out my art store: http://www.marfknox.etsy.com

Edited by - marfknox on 06/04/2007 20:37:18
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