quote:

---

from:
AntiShyster
Volume 6, Number 3

Feudalism: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

Pure Socialism: You have two cows. The State takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of the cows. The State gives you as much milk as you need.

Bureaucratic Socialism: You have two cows. The State takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of all the chickens the State took from the chicken farmers. The State gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you should need.

Pure Fascism: You have two cows. The State takes both, hires you to take care of them and sells you the milk.

Corporate Fascism: You have two cows. The State takes both; their cronies form a corporation, hire you to take care of the cows and sells you the milk.

Dictatorship: You have two cows. The State takes both; drafts you.
Pure Communism: You have two cows. Your neighbor helps you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

Russian Communism: You have two cows. You have to take care of them but the State takes all the milk.

Cambodian Communism: You have two cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

Pure Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbor decides who gets the milk.

Represenative Democracy: You have two cows. Your neighbor picks someone to tell you who gets the milk.

Bureaucracy: You have two cows. At first the State regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

Pure-Anarchy: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

Libertarian-anarcho-capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. [Or some strangers try to take the cow/bull and kill you -- maybe they are stopped by a private protection agency, maybe they are not...]

Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The State requires you to take harmonica lessons.

---