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5/12/2005
Stupid Fucking Republicans:
The Rude Pundit has known some sexy animals in his time. Dogs that he thought winked at him, including this fine Irish setter bitch that would glare intensely at him while she licked herself. Cats that liked to nuzzle a bit too tightly in his lap. The Rude Pundit once lived on a corn farm in the middle of fucking nowhere, and the farmer would buy a new cow every year to fatten up for slaughter. Farmer Joe never named the cows (except "Sirloin" or "Porterhouse"), but early on, oh, sweet bossie, this one cow had some hot haunches, a quietly erotic sashay whenever it walked from one hay bundle to the next, inviting "lips" bemusedly chewing cud. Goddamn. Still, however much those animals appeared to be saying, "You know you want some sweet canine/feline/bovine 'tang," the Rude Pundit was never once tempted to open the barn doors to paradise. In fact, Farmer Joe's teenage sons never porked bossie, either. But maybe there was a problem. Maybe we all needed a mule.

'Cause, see, when the abortion doctor murderer enabler Neal Horsley told Alan Colmes that he had fucked farm animals, Horsley, honoring the first syllable of that name, specified that he had, indeed, fucked a mule: "When you grow up on a farm in Georgia, your first girlfriend is a mule." (He has a picture of his parents posted at his website of hate.) Now, Horsley didn't say whether or not he brought the mule flowers or if he cuddled after fucking her, but Horsley got his country dander up when Colmes suggested that this was bizarre behavior. Said Colmes, "Are you suggesting that everybody who grows up on a farm in Georgia has a mule as a girlfriend?"

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Briefly Questioned:
Why the fuck was the President of the United States biking on a wildlife preserve in Maryland in the middle of the goddamn day? Isn't there a fuckin' gym in the White House? And why the fuck wasn't he notified until after "the danger" had passed about a suspected attack on Washington, which caused evacuations, including his own wife? Wouldn't you wanna know if your wife was being threatened with death? Did they know it wasn't really a threat? Was it a show? Or did they just not want to face that stomach churning blank stare of his as he tries to figure out what the fuck to do, stuck sweaty in his shorts in the suburban wetlands?

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We no longer have a government. All we have is a circle-jerk in the middle of a freak show.

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Do sexually perverted Republicans automatically get a free pass? And how come there seems to be so many of them?"

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Originally posted by Dude

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Do sexually perverted Republicans automatically get a free pass? And how come there seems to be so many of them?"

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They are the party of "values" and "morals". A few pedophilic homosexuals and goat-raping anti-abortionists can't tarnish the party's stance on values!

There are so many of them because they have mixed religion up with politics. The two things that most attract the powerhungry deviants in the world. The republicans are wrapped up so tight in their little love-blanket with the religious right, that fuckwads like Dobson can threaten republican legislators and make them do what he tells them to. He literally threatened republicans with repricussions if they back down on the "nuc-le-ar option" bullshit. He seriously wants the senate rules changed so he can cram these 10 nut-fuck-crazy judges down the throat of the American people.

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