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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
 Posted - 11/30/2010 : 03:13:28
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There are at least a million of these "you might be if" things kicking around, none of them worth much consideration. Therefore, here's another; one that will surely give you a greater insight into what it takes to be a loyal Republican. There are some 50 examples in this thing and all have a chilling ring of truth. Here's the first:
1. You believe George W. Bush’s redistribution of middle-class tax cuts to the top 1% of tax-payers was good for America, but Obama’s plan to return it to the middle class is ‘socialism.’
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And another:
15. You believe Terri Schiavo was sentient all along, and Bill Frist had the ability to diagnose her condition by watching a 5 second video of her sleeping.
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One more:
25. You think Darwin’s theory of evolution is a loony fairy tale, and mankind actually began with two naked teenagers, a magic apple and a talking snake.
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And so forth. 
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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Robb
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 12/02/2010 : 11:57:03 [Permalink]
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How about these:
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokedemocrat.htm
You may be a democrate if:
| You believe that a few hundred loggers can find another career, but the defenseless spotted owl must live in its preferred tree. |
| You keep count of how many people you know in each racial or ethnic category. |
| You think solar energy is being held back by those greedy oil companies. |
| You think the Flat Tax should be at 95% |
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Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. - George Washington |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
 Posted - 12/02/2010 : 13:30:03 [Permalink]
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Hell Robb, I despise Democrats almost as much as I loath Republicans. We need a third party bad! Indeed, a forth and fifth party would be ok, too.
Got something for Independants? 
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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| Edited by - filthy on 12/02/2010 13:31:35 |
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Robb
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
 Posted - 12/03/2010 : 18:58:52 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by filthy
Hell Robb, I despise Democrats almost as much as I loath Republicans. We need a third party bad! Indeed, a forth and fifth party would be ok, too.
Got something for Independants?
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I generally despise the republicans as well. I don't see a third party soon other than once in a while but those are almost all single issue parties and wil never attract enough people.
I am leaning toward repealing the 17th ammendment may be a good idea. I think it would take power away from the federal government. But I haven't realy decided. |
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. - George Washington |
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 12/03/2010 : 22:07:41 [Permalink]
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So you think letting state legislatures appoint senators, rather than the people of a state electing them, is going to somehow work out to reduce the power of the federal government? How exactly?
Also, how do you reconcile the idea of appointed legislators with democracy?
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Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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Cuneiformist
The Imperfectionist
USA
4955 Posts |
Posted - 12/18/2010 : 23:51:36 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Robb
How about these:
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/jokes/bljokedemocrat.htm
You may be a democrate if:
| You believe that a few hundred loggers can find another career, but the defenseless spotted owl must live in its preferred tree. |
| You keep count of how many people you know in each racial or ethnic category. |
| You think solar energy is being held back by those greedy oil companies. |
| You think the Flat Tax should be at 95% |
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But these are all pretty lame. Why do those on the far right seem so challenged when it comes to humor? The last one is an example of how lame the jokes are. A "flat tax" is decidedly regressive; few people who identify with the left would want it. So the joke is rather lame. |
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H. Humbert
SFN Die Hard
USA
4574 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2010 : 01:19:26 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Cuneiformist
Why do those on the far right seem so challenged when it comes to humor? |
Ever notice the liberals always have the best comedians? Look who's on our side: Carlin, Pryor, Kinison, Ricky Gervais, John Stewart, Bill Maher, Steve Martin, Lenny Bruce, Woody Allen, Eddie Izzard, Bill Hicks, etc., etc., etc.
Who do conservatives have? Dennis Miller, Gallagher, and Larry the Cable Guy.
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"A man is his own easiest dupe, for what he wishes to be true he generally believes to be true." --Demosthenes
"The first principle is that you must not fool yourself - and you are the easiest person to fool." --Richard P. Feynman
"Face facts with dignity." --found inside a fortune cookie |
| Edited by - H. Humbert on 12/19/2010 01:21:14 |
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend
Sweden
9688 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2010 : 03:45:46 [Permalink]
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| As long as you're ennumerating republican commedians, don't forget Sarah Palin. |
Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3
"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse
Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder. |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2010 : 06:29:58 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse
As long as you're ennumerating republican commedians, don't forget Sarah Palin.
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Proving that some comedians ain't all that funny, but she has her moments.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 12/19/2010 : 10:54:37 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by H. Humbert
Originally posted by Cuneiformist
Why do those on the far right seem so challenged when it comes to humor? |
Ever notice the liberals always have the best comedians? Look who's on our side: Carlin, Pryor, Kinison, Ricky Gervais, John Stewart, Bill Maher, Steve Martin, Lenny Bruce, Woody Allen, Eddie Izzard, Bill Hicks, etc., etc., etc.
Who do conservatives have? Dennis Miller, Gallagher, and Larry the Cable Guy.
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And Dennis Miller used to be a liberal, before he sold out to the promise of millions or people to buy his books.
I swear when I watch him these days you can see in his eyes an internal dialogue, "Am I really standing here saying this shit? Yes, apparently I am a massive whore and will do anything for money.... I can't go back now though, my original audience fucking HATES me..."
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Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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tw101356
Skeptic Friend
USA
333 Posts |
Posted - 12/20/2010 : 13:31:38 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse
As long as you're ennumerating republican commedians, don't forget Sarah Palin.
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Clowns may be funny, but they're not always comedians.  |
- TW
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend
Sweden
9688 Posts |
Posted - 12/21/2010 : 07:32:43 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by tw101356
Originally posted by Dr. Mabuse
As long as you're ennumerating republican commedians, don't forget Sarah Palin.
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Clowns may be funny, but they're not always comedians.
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You got me there...  |
Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3
"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse
Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder. |
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Machi4velli
SFN Regular
USA
854 Posts |
Posted - 12/31/2010 : 23:43:27 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Cuneiformist
But these are all pretty lame. Why do those on the far right seem so challenged when it comes to humor? The last one is an example of how lame the jokes are. A "flat tax" is decidedly regressive; few people who identify with the left would want it. So the joke is rather lame.
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Most of the ones in the other link are lame too =/ |
"Truth does not change because it is, or is not, believed by a majority of the people."
-Giordano Bruno
"The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, but the illusion of knowledge."
-Stephen Hawking
"Seeking what is true is not seeking what is desirable"
-Albert Camus |
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moakley
SFN Regular
USA
1888 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2011 : 07:19:00 [Permalink]
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You might be a republican if you take a joke with attribution and spread it all over the internet without checking a few simple details first. First saw the following on FB. Checked it out and found it all over the internet starting about the 3rd week of December. Concerning the "fact" that this year groundhog day and the presidents SOTU fall on the same day.
As Air America Radio pointed out, "It is an ironic juxtaposition of events; one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication while the other involves a groundhog."
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If Air America really said this it was probably said 6 years ago. |
Life is good
Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned. -Anonymous |
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Robb
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2011 : 18:56:21 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by moakley
You might be a republican if you take a joke with attribution and spread it all over the internet without checking a few simple details first. First saw the following on FB. Checked it out and found it all over the internet starting about the 3rd week of December. Concerning the "fact" that this year groundhog day and the presidents SOTU fall on the same day.
As Air America Radio pointed out, "It is an ironic juxtaposition of events; one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication while the other involves a groundhog."
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If Air America really said this it was probably said 6 years ago.
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You check the facts on jokes? It wasn't meant to be factual. It was meant to be comedy. |
Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master. - George Washington |
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moakley
SFN Regular
USA
1888 Posts |
Posted - 01/12/2011 : 19:31:36 [Permalink]
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Originally posted by Robb
Originally posted by moakley
You might be a republican if you take a joke with attribution and spread it all over the internet without checking a few simple details first. First saw the following on FB. Checked it out and found it all over the internet starting about the 3rd week of December. Concerning the "fact" that this year groundhog day and the presidents SOTU fall on the same day.
As Air America Radio pointed out, "It is an ironic juxtaposition of events; one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a creature of little intelligence for prognostication while the other involves a groundhog."
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If Air America really said this it was probably said 6 years ago.
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You check the facts on jokes? It wasn't meant to be factual. It was meant to be comedy.
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Right and it was likely said about Bush since he actually delivered the 2005 SOTU on February 2nd. A talking head on Air America radio could have actually said that since they began broadcasting in March 2004. In the context of that reality it was funny. In it's current context it is cut and paste, more lie than joke. Beside I felt it was my duty to inform those who are willfully uninformed and apparently proud of it judging by the other comments I read. |
Life is good
Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned. -Anonymous |
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You might be a Republican if.....
