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 What's your major malfunction?
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HalfMooner
Dingaling

Philippines
15831 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  20:05:15  Show Profile Send HalfMooner a Private Message  Reply with Quote
pleco's comments about tinnitis got me thinking about this subject.

I'd prefer to keep this to our single, most-major "malfunctions," though you are welcome to wander.

I'll start.

I had a stroke in November, 2004. It was in the right side of my brain, and caused severe paralysis, numbness, and loss of kinesthesia on my whole left side. Doctors found no sign of a clot when doing an ultrasound check on my carotid arteries. I also suffered from some loss of memory, slight slurring of speech, and considerable problems in processing thoughts logically. (I'd tend to badly lose tract of the threads of my thoughts.) I was slow in being able to remember nouns. I was unable to walk, even with a cane, for a few months.

I still only remember parts of what happened after the stroke, though those memories are vivid. (I remember crawling about my house and arranging for the care of my dog before I called an ambulance.)

All those symptoms are far less of a problem now. I walk, I type with both hands, and my ability to write has probably improved compared to prior to the stroke. I believe this is due to the fact that I have deliberately dived into SFN as a tonic for my brain, just as I have played MMORGs for similar reasons. (Of course, I'd want to do both of these even if I hadn't had the stroke.

I've recently undergone some additional physical therapy to address a "foot drop" problem that has increasingly been making me trip. (My left toes tend to catch the ground unexpectedly, causing a stumble.) I'm now wearing a device called a Dynasplint eight hours a day, to help stretch out my contracted left Achilles tendon. I will also soon have a dorsi-flexion assist brace to help me when I'm walking. And I do exercises to rebuild the muscles in my lower left leg.

I'm now on much better BP and other meds than I'd been prescribed prior to my stroke. I feel very thankful to evolution, family, and medical science that I've done as well as I have, and piously blame an uncaring God for my remaining difficulties.

So, maggot, what's your major malfunction?


Biology is just physics that has begun to smell bad.” —HalfMooner
Here's a link to Moonscape News, and one to its Archive.

Edited by - HalfMooner on 09/17/2007 20:08:27

Original_Intent
SFN Regular

USA
609 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  20:14:38   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Original_Intent a Private Message  Reply with Quote
An allergy to those perfectly safe FDA food colors, esp red.....

Caused ADHD as a kid until my mother fgured it out. Though I outgrew it.... but noooooooooo......

Eat a little red.... have a Chrons attack. Doctor thinks I am nuts, I respect him a great deal, as his treatmensts are good, and he is conservative... so I just call him silly.......

All-in=all I cannot call it too big of a malfunction. It hits me hard, but I am generally over the symptoms quickly after a bit of prednisone, and by the time he gets around to scoping me (Go-litely anyone? Can you believe they called the studd Go Litely?) Fine sense if humor, those guys), I am all but cleared up.
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Dave W.
Info Junkie

USA
26022 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  20:18:35   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Dave W.'s Homepage Send Dave W. a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Due to this damn Internet thing, I'm too heavy.

(Yeah, I've got psoriasis, too, but the problems it causes pale in comparison to the extra tonnage I'm carrying.)

- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too.
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  20:37:11   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Tramatic osteo-arthritis from numerous fractures including my spine, both hands, right foot & ankle, among too many others. I also have a bone-to-bone knee that I've been refusing to get replaced, and that gets more arthritic by the day. Thanks to getting a steel hip, I can walk, but not very far nor very fast due to the spine. I'm still riding the motorcycle but again, not for much distance anymore because the bone spurs in my spinal fusions (had 2 of them) won't allow it.

I'm supposed to be on pain killers, but they (the VA) give me oxycodone and quite frankly, I'd rather have the pain. That stuff makes me sick as hell & with a bad head, and doesn't cool things off enough to be worth it. So I substitute a little whisky and a bowl, and that works well enough. Of course, this sort of thing and motorcycles are not a good combination, so I only 'medicate' myself at home.

I'm doing better. For a long while, I was all but house-bound, but lately I've been enjoying some pretty good months -- getting out and about more. I'm planning a trip to the mountains on the bike, when my money gets right. I figure that I can do it as long as I don't try to do it quickly. One day's ride in two or even three, perhaps.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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The Rat
SFN Regular

Canada
1370 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  21:26:21   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit The Rat's Homepage Send The Rat a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Two biggies:

1) Back in 1976 I put myself under extreme physical and emotional stress (a story in itself...), and it resulted in an epileptic seizure. I had no history of epilepsy, and have had nothing since. A battery of tests confirm that I do not have epilepsy, it was just a one-time thing which could happen to anyone in the same condition. Result? I was just a few hours away from completing my Private Pilot License training, it immediately stopped and I can never fly again. And it isn't something that can be cured because there's nothing wrong with me, but the rules are clear - seizure, no license, ever.

2) In 1985 I came down with an immune sytem problem called 'idiopathic immunothrombocytipenia'. Cause is unknown (idiopathic), but what basically happened is that my immune system kicked into hyperdrive and started identifying my thrombocytes (platelets) as invading organisms and started killing them off, so I had no clotting factor. Worse than hemophilia, with that you get an infusion of platelets and you're good for a couple of weeks I believe, but if I had that done my immune system would have finished them off in a couple of days. I beat the odds three times; first, it's a rare condition, second, it normally happens in adolescent girls, heterosexual males over 30 are the lowest risk group for it, and third, it doesn't usually come back - mine did thirteen years later. The first time it was beaten with massive doses of Prednisone, a steroid which, given its side effects, I am convinced is one of the worst drugs ever invented. The trade-off is that it keeps you alive. The second time the Prednisone suppressed the immune system, but when I tapered off the platelet count nose-dived again, so it was time for the final cure - splenectomy.

Crossing my fingers now every time I get a cut...

Bailey's second law; There is no relationship between the three virtues of intelligence, education, and wisdom.

You fiend! Never have I encountered such corrupt and foul-minded perversity! Have you ever considered a career in the Church? - The Bishop of Bath and Wells, Blackadder II

Baculum's page: http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MemberId=3947338590
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JEROME DA GNOME
BANNED

2418 Posts

Posted - 09/17/2007 :  21:58:01   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send JEROME DA GNOME a Private Message  Reply with Quote
WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION, PYLE!



THE BEST PART OF YOU RAN DOWN THE CRACK OF YOUR MOTHERS ASS AND ENDED UP AS A BROWN STAIN ON THE MATTRESS!


What a man believes upon grossly insufficient evidence is an index into his desires -- desires of which he himself is often unconscious. If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way. - Bertrand Russell
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BigPapaSmurf
SFN Die Hard

3192 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  05:31:27   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send BigPapaSmurf a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Im in perfect health, or so the doctors I dont go see tell me.

But Dr. Papa has self-diagnosed arthritis in some knuckles, my neck and the end joint on my #1 finger* Also I am extermely unhealthy in general, from excessive smoking and an attempt at suicide by daily bacon ingestion. (the greatest way to die) I also probably have an ulcer, or close to it from the Coca-cola Ive been downing for years.

*This is from a career ending disc golf injury:(

"...things I have neither seen nor experienced nor heard tell of from anybody else; things, what is more, that do not in fact exist and could not ever exist at all. So my readers must not believe a word I say." -Lucian on his book True History

"...They accept such things on faith alone, without any evidence. So if a fraudulent and cunning person who knows how to take advantage of a situation comes among them, he can make himself rich in a short time." -Lucian critical of early Christians c.166 AD From his book, De Morte Peregrini
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Gorgo
SFN Die Hard

USA
5310 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  06:28:25   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Gorgo a Private Message  Reply with Quote
To quote Christopher Hitchens, "his looks have deteriorated to the point that only women will have sex with him."

I know the rent is in arrears
The dog has not been fed in years
It's even worse than it appears
But it's alright-
Jerry Garcia
Robert Hunter



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furshur
SFN Regular

USA
1536 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  06:43:35   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send furshur a Private Message  Reply with Quote
All I have is a pinched nerve in my neck that occasionally causes one of my back muscles to go into spasm, but it is not that big of a deal. I consider myself very luck, I'm 52 and feel great. I still suspect that I will die within the next 30 years or so but all in all pretty good.

Filthy glad to hear your feeling better. Sorry to hear that your body went through a meat grinder some years back. Good luck on your bike trip.


If I knew then what I know now then I would know more now than I know.
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filthy
SFN Die Hard

USA
14408 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  07:32:33   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send filthy a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Originally posted by furshur

All I have is a pinched nerve in my neck that occasionally causes one of my back muscles to go into spasm, but it is not that big of a deal. I consider myself very luck, I'm 52 and feel great. I still suspect that I will die within the next 30 years or so but all in all pretty good.

Filthy glad to hear your feeling better. Sorry to hear that your body went through a meat grinder some years back. Good luck on your bike trip.


Thanks! Probably won't be 'till next year, as things stand now.

I know well enough about back spsams and can deeply sympathize. They are a bitch-kitty to live with. You might try muscle relaxers; although they don't work for me they do for others.




"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)

"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres


"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude

Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,

and Crypto-Communist!

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Kil
Evil Skeptic

USA
13477 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  08:08:56   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit Kil's Homepage  Send Kil an AOL message  Send Kil a Yahoo! Message Send Kil a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Well darn.

About a year and a half ago I had a case of indigestion that turned out to be a heart attack. I now live with two stents in me and must take blood-thinning pills and lipitor.

I have type 2 diabetes. Under control but more pills. (I do use a needle when my blood sugar reaches a certain level.)

Aches and pains from getting older are with me constantly, as I still have a physically demanding job. Sometimes my aches have aches. (This is the dirty trick life plays on most people getting older. The better I get at what I do the more it hurts.)

Memory ain't what it used to be…

Hell, this list could go on but it's starting to depress me.

All in all it could be that the physical stuff that comes with getting older is my main complaint. But it still beats the alternative.







Uncertainty may make you uncomfortable. Certainty makes you ridiculous.

Why not question something for a change?

Genetic Literacy Project
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Rubicon95
Skeptic Friend

USA
220 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  08:21:23   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send Rubicon95 a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Ulnar Neuropathy on both arms. Back in 1996, began to have severe pain in my hands. My ring finger and pinky on my left would go numb. My right side would ache. 1st doctor said I was just getting old. (32 is old?!?!). He reconsidered his opinion when he heard me yell in pain as he manipulated my arms. Sent me to an hand guy who tested me for Carpal tunnel. The testing had shown disproven carpal tunnel. He then sent me to get an EMG --- A guy shoots electricty through you and judges the reaction. (I did ask him if I held a light bulb would it go on..."Only if we remove the ground" he said "Wanna try?"). He then check the muscles in my hand by sticking a probe in it and listening to the muscles. It was fascinating to hear the electrical pulses of the muscles work. Bloody incredible...and bloody as well. The end result the ulnar nerve is being pinched at my elbow and muscles in my hand had begun to atrophy.
In essence, I got the "Black lung disease" of the information age.

Filthy, I know how you feel with the pain meds. I can't take the good stuff either. Any Codeine product makes me sick as dog.
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perrodetokio
Skeptic Friend

275 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  08:23:56   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send perrodetokio a Private Message  Reply with Quote
Just mild psoriais which at times it gets a lot worse but after a period of times goes back to "mild" (meaning itīs not life-threatening even if i have sores and flakes all over my body and lifted thumb and big toe nails) and a bit of psoriatic arthritis in a few joints (toes: I have the infamous "sausage toe", fingers and wrists which I try to take good care of since I play bass guitar).

The other thing is I should really stop smoking (tobbacco, which I suspect is the worse kind of smoke after crack) before I develope serious problems.

edited to add:
I forgot about my lower back problems, however since I have it under control since I started yoga three years ago, I donīt count it even if it all comes back whenever I stop yoga for a period of time).

"Yes I have a belief in a creator/God but do not know that he exists." Bill Scott

"They are still mosquitoes! They did not turn into whales or lizards or anything else. They are still mosquitoes!..." Bill Scott

"We should have millions of missing links or transition fossils showing a fish turning into a philosopher..." Bill Scott
Edited by - perrodetokio on 09/18/2007 08:26:11
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend

Sweden
9688 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  08:31:52   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Send Dr. Mabuse an ICQ Message Send Dr. Mabuse a Private Message  Reply with Quote
December 2000 I broke the neck of the femur while playing floorball.

The displaced ball of the femur caused the blood vessels in the bone to snap and not heal correctly, and from then the cartilage on the hip ball never got enough nourishment. The top of the ball and the cartilage is slowly collapsing as necrosis is slowly spreading through the tissue, causing osteo-arthritis.

I started to experience symptoms of that in 2002, and in the beginning I was taking the medicine Bextra, similar to Vioxx. But during a routine medical checkup at work, my blood pressure was 175/115 and I was promptly taken off that med and got an NSAID instead. During a period of 3 years I slowly developed a severe ulcer that finally started bleeding this easter. I was treated with medication and a 2litre blood transfusion to replace most but not all of the blood I'd lost.

Today, I'm waiting to be called to an x-ray and then a hip surgeon for consultation. I've found an alternative to a total hip replacement that seems promising: The Birmingham Resurfacing Method.
I hope I can get that soon, because the amount of tramadol I'm stuffing myself with in order to get a modest relief from the most severe pain can't be good in the long run.


Edited: spelling and added osteo-arthritis

Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3

"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse

Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder.
Edited by - Dr. Mabuse on 09/18/2007 11:38:56
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pleco
SFN Addict

USA
2998 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  08:42:50   [Permalink]  Show Profile  Visit pleco's Homepage Send pleco a Private Message  Reply with Quote
In my humble opinion, someone didn't design the human body well at all, and should be fired.

by Filthy
The neo-con methane machine will soon be running at full fart.
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furshur
SFN Regular

USA
1536 Posts

Posted - 09/18/2007 :  09:20:03   [Permalink]  Show Profile Send furshur a Private Message  Reply with Quote
I'll say a quick prayer and everyone should start feeling better.


If I knew then what I know now then I would know more now than I know.
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