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GeeMack
SFN Regular
USA
1093 Posts |
 Posted - 12/14/2005 : 15:53:10 [Permalink]
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1. At the end of August, the fatalities suffered by American forces in Iraq will overtake 2,801, the number of people lost in the 9/11 attacks. This fact will be brought to the attention of George W. Bush, who will believe it supports his claim that 9/11 and his war against the citizens of Iraq are somehow connected.
2. By the end of December, the total number of WMDs discovered in Iraq during 2006 will be exactly equal to the total discovered during 2005. Despite this fact, George W. Bush will continue to proclaim that we should live in fear of the threat posed by those evil Iraqis.
3. Several times during the year it will be demonstrated again that a sizable majority of Iraqis favor a complete pullout by US forces. Despite this fact, George W. Bush will refuse to remove the troops. He will continue to parrot his claim that instilling democracy in Iraq is a primary rationale for continuing his occupation of that nation.
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BigPapaSmurf
SFN Die Hard
3192 Posts |
Posted - 12/15/2005 : 11:32:27 [Permalink]
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http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/4532344.stm
I got one from last year...an easy one but hey Im taking it to the grave!
quote:
3) 2005 will be among the three hottest years ever recorded.
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"...things I have neither seen nor experienced nor heard tell of from anybody else; things, what is more, that do not in fact exist and could not ever exist at all. So my readers must not believe a word I say." -Lucian on his book True History
"...They accept such things on faith alone, without any evidence. So if a fraudulent and cunning person who knows how to take advantage of a situation comes among them, he can make himself rich in a short time." -Lucian critical of early Christians c.166 AD From his book, De Morte Peregrini |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 12/16/2005 : 02:59:48 [Permalink]
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26. In a glorius spasm of stupidity, the court ruling will be reversed and Cobb County, GA will again paste "Evolution is a theory, not a fact." stickers in it's science textbooks. Many of the stickers will be obscenely defaced by hell-bound students.
27. Another large, Burmese python, this one very much alive, will be seen and photographed by a sport fisherman in the Everglades. Attempts to hunt it down will be unsuccessful. Asked to comment, the photographer will say, "I wasn't goin' anywhere near that big fucker!" That remark will be heavily edited in the newspaper story.
28. The Americam Family Association will call for a boycott of Ford Motor Company. No one beyond anti-gay groups will care -- this one is too easy.
29. The ecology of the Great Lakes will be officially declared in collapse.
30. Laura Bush, whose hair hasn't moved in decades, will change her style.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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Siberia
SFN Addict
Brazil
2322 Posts |
Posted - 12/16/2005 : 06:34:47 [Permalink]
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The sea levels will rise and we're all gonna die... nahh, not really.
A new species of hummingbird will be found, as well as a new orchid. The orchid will be considered a miraculous cure for cancer and will disappear as fast as it was found. It wasn't. |
"Why are you afraid of something you're not even sure exists?"
- The Kovenant, Via Negativa
"People who don't like their beliefs being laughed at shouldn't have such funny beliefs."
-- unknown
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ronnywhite
SFN Regular
501 Posts |
Posted - 12/16/2005 : 10:28:46 [Permalink]
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Not much I can add, cause y'all are just nailing these predictions dead on, left-and-right. Applying critical thinking, this tells me most of you used the same Ouija Board I did... ya gottem' half-off at Walgreens Pharmacy when you bought your magnet therapy wraps, didn't ya? I knew it! Ain't it cool to see a major pharmacy chain finally realizes that just because there's no scientific evidence supporting something, and Western medicine considers it numbskull quackery, that doesn't mean they can't make a buck off it... uh, I mean... it doesn't work just great? Back to the matter at hand, I'll throw another diabolically accurate premonition into each of a few categories already covered...
Politics Department
As pressures begin to mount on excessive federal spending, demands for domestic program funding will escalate, with trade deficit issues coming under scrutiny... and a new economic policy- "Supply of the Supply Side Economics" is promoted, based upon Ronald Reagan's wildly popular "Supply Side Economics" theory- and hypothetically escalating and enhancing it's effectiveness by simultaneously raising private taxes to enable larger corporate tax breaks.
Science Department
New satellite data will again raise the century-old speculation of a solid Sun, yielding generous government research funding... after fundamentalist lobbyists advocating Intelligent Design learn validation of the new theoretical implications will raise serious doubts as to currently accepted "Big Bang" related theories, and forward their cause.
Yet Another Talented Conservative Diva Department
Anna Nicole Smith will be moderately victorious in a final Supreme Court decision pertaining to her beloved husband's will, and resume her TV career as a daytime talk show host, while considering aspirations for a possible Texas gubernatorial run having been inspired by the continuation of a fellow prodigal Texan's howling political successes... with renewed confidence that the Court's decision will vindicate public questioning of her Family Values stance. |
Ron White |
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26022 Posts |
Posted - 12/20/2005 : 20:59:52 [Permalink]
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| Is a prediction that ID proponents will refuse to admit that the case for ID sucked in Dover, and instead continue to claim that Judge Jones is an "activist," too obvious? |
- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too. |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 12/21/2005 : 03:24:37 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Dave W.
Is a prediction that ID proponents will refuse to admit that the case for ID sucked in Dover, and instead continue to claim that Judge Jones is an "activist," too obvious?
The fact of it might be but the degree is still open to question. Dembski, et al, with tears as big as horse turds running down their cheeks, are already crying, "Rape!!" and whining about the fix being in.
31. Michael Behe, unable to deal with this latest debacle, will retire to finish writing his memoirs. The book will enjoy excellent sales within a limited segment of the population, even though some "evilutionist soreheads" wrote devastating reviews of it at Amazon.com.
32. Ken Ham will open his AiG creation museum(?) to great acclaim. The fee to get in will not be discussed at the website due to it's magnitude.
33. A new species of bullfrog will be discovered. To the hilarity of all, it will be named Rana Gishi -- ok, that one is wishful dreaming, but wouldn't it be marvelous if.....
34. Jonathon Sarfati will win another chess tournament -- the guy is really good at it, so this one might be too obvious. Never the less, he will not submit any new research in chemestry for scientific review beyond his in-house journal.
35. Mammoth DNA will be completly decoded and calls for cloning one will resound. It will not be attempted this year.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26022 Posts |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 12/30/2005 : 04:23:20 [Permalink]
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36. During the summer of the coming year we will witness a great deal of pre-election hand-wringing on the part of Republicans about terrorist threats to the homeland.
37. The Iraqi Kurds will attempt to split off northern Iraq for their own. It will be called Kurdistan, and the Turks will not be happy about it.
38. On Thursday, October 5, 2006, 7:35 pm, Bill Dembski will be nominated for an ig Noble Award. Due to scientific nature of this prestigious honor, and the inherent dishonesty of Dembski, the nomination will fail and the persons who put forth and seconded his name will be booed from the hall.
39. Borrowing a page from Coca-Cola's book, Budwiser will market 'New Bud.' It will not be an improvement over the bilge thay already produce, but will cause 'Old Bud' sales to skyrocket.
40. The art of haiku will enjoy a revival at SFN as a member composes a particularly nasty one aimed at another member.
That's all I got....
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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Dr. Mabuse
Septic Fiend
Sweden
9688 Posts |
Posted - 12/30/2005 : 07:02:12 [Permalink]
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| 41. Creationists will manage to sneak another article into a peer-reviewd journal without it being subject to the standard review procedure. The Discovery Institute will rejoice as they tout out the lie that ID is a real science, and point to the article as evidence. |
Dr. Mabuse - "When the going gets tough, the tough get Duct-tape..."
Dr. Mabuse whisper.mp3
"Equivocation is not just a job, for a creationist it's a way of life..." Dr. Mabuse
Support American Troops in Iraq:
Send them unarmed civilians for target practice..
Collateralmurder. |
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Chippewa
SFN Regular
USA
1496 Posts |
Posted - 12/30/2005 : 10:43:52 [Permalink]
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42. Impeachment proceedings against George W. Bush will commence.
43. The Bush twins will join the military (Navy and Army) and appear in stylized and tailored designer uniforms promoting the "War on Terror". However, they will never serve in combat but sometimes make unannounced appearances in Iraq serving Thanksgiving turkey to "support the troops".
44. Pseudo Democrat Zell Miller will once again campaign for the Republicans. He will join fight (and Bush) promoter Don King on a nationwide tour. Miller will wear a fake wig in the style of Don King's hair, which will not offend King.
45. Ann Coulter will come out in favor of "Republican Focus Camps" for those who oppose the war or don't support the President.
46. A New York Times reporter will find a copy of Hitler's book "Mein Kampf" in Carl Rove's office. It will be noted that all anti-Semitic references are crossed out and replaced by phrases like "Liberals" and "Democrats".
47. Evangelical Christian churches will consider Biblical justification for introducing a "born-again berka" to female members of their congregations.
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26022 Posts |
Posted - 01/01/2006 : 20:43:04 [Permalink]
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I'm giving beskeptigal a pass on the time limit. Over here, she wrote:
Sheesh, couldn't you have given us procrastinators at least through today to post our predictions?
Here are my psychic predictions for 06:
The Bird flu will spread to birds in Europe and Africa and shortly thereafter to the Americas. It will be more from smuggling exotic birds than wild bird migration.
Human cases will rise sporadically for many months. Then there will be a few isolated outbreaks of human to human transmission.
A major pandemic will not occur until 2007 but it will happen sometime that year.
There will be at least 3 mag 7 earthquakes that will affect populated areas including one more large tsunami generating quake in the area south or north of the 12-26-04 big one. While people will remember to run uphill when the tide goes out in a strange way, thousands will still be killed including some tourists who walk out to see the funny low tide or who walk out there thinking they have time to outrun the incoming wave. Only a few people will remember there is more than one wave coming and that will result in many deaths.
The Iraq war will be unchanged in 2006. Bush will move a few troops around in an effort to appear to be withdrawing, but it will just be for show. The insurgency in Afghanistan will increase. Spying on US citizens will continue and it will be revealed that the target the FISA court was not informed of was reporters who received the leaks about the CIA torturing prisoners in other countries. Protest by the American public will be minimal.
It will be another record year for hurricanes and cyclones. New Orleans will not take a direct hit but will not have recovered by the end of 06 either. The levies will not be adequately rebuilt and will again fail though my psychic information is fuzzy as to when.
More houses will burn in wildfires in both the USA and in Australia.
The magnetic poles will move even more erratically but it will not affect any travelers since GPS and the European satellite will be the means of navigation for everyone anyway. We won't have weird auroras and big solar flares in 06 but we might see weird effects of the shifting magnetic poles and solar flares by 2010.
Bangladesh will flood.
My vision is fading now......I will need rest before I can make more predictions. My book will be released soon. You can order an advanced copy at your local bookstore. ;) |
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