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Huluhae
New Member
16 Posts |
 Posted - 05/28/2004 : 12:55:28
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Hi folks,
I don't post on here very often, I'm usually more happy to just read and learn. Thought I'd get your opinions on something that happened yesterday at 7 pm. Me and the husband were sitting around the house, waiting for the doula to arrive when the door bell rang. Excited, I slung open the door to see a little roly-poly man standing there.
Immediately, he starts trying to sell me to Christ. I explain to him that I'm atheist and have even **gasp!** read the Bible cover to cover, plus read independent information about the Bible. And no, I still do not believe there is a guy floating above my head on a puffy cloud who made himself and the world out of nothing.
So, Tweedle Dee comes back with the "don't you believe God made the sky?" argument, and I said nope, not a bit. Then he tried the one about either I believed the Bible or I believed in Big Bang Theory. I believe that's called bifurcation. Truth is, I definitely don't believe in the Bible, but I don't know enough about Big Bang to know how I feel about that. Then he tried to use that argument about if he tossed car parts in the air, it should come down as a car. I recogized that as the "watch in the desert" argument.
What gets me is that he stood on my porch for 20 mins., even though it was obvious that I didn't believe, and that I was getting rather annoyed. Oh, and the best part is he tried to convince he that his god is a kind and loving god because "he killed my two brothers." Ah, yeah, kind and loving...
Anyhow, I hate this is so long. Does anyone have any advice for what I can say next time one of these Tweedle Dees knock on my door?
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Happy Memorial Day to Everyone!
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Ricky
SFN Die Hard
USA
4907 Posts |
 Posted - 05/28/2004 : 13:24:48 [Permalink]
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Well, personally I would love for that to happen, to try to debate a Christian down to nothing because as long as they are willing to talk, thats what normally happens.
"Anyhow, I hate this is so long. Does anyone have any advice for what I can say next time one of these Tweedle Dees knock on my door"
Well, mostly just refute whatever he says, there is really no need for more. The car, for example, would come together if all the pieces stayed in place once they were in the right place in about 3 billion years (thats how evolution works, the "correct" parts are kept, the "incorrect" parts are "retossed"). Just using logic can get you very far.
A question I like asking is:
There is a dragon in my garage. He is invisible and can not be observed in any way. Do you believe that I have a dragon? |
Why continue? Because we must. Because we have the call. Because it is nobler to fight for rationality without winning than to give up in the face of continued defeats. Because whatever true progress humanity makes is through the rationality of the occasional individual and because any one individual we may win for the cause may do more for humanity than a hundred thousand who hug their superstitions to their breast.
- Isaac Asimov |
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Cuneiformist
The Imperfectionist
USA
4955 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 13:34:30 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Huluhae
Hi folks,
Anyhow, I hate this is so long. Does anyone have any advice for what I can say next time one of these Tweedle Dees knock on my door?
The question is if you want to get rid of him or if you want to debate. One thing I've told people who try to witness to me (and to whom I wish to be polite) is something along the lines of "I'm very comfortable in what I beleive, but thanks for asking."
Of course, since you've gone and told Humpty Dumpty that you're an atheist he'll no doubt muster the troops to try and bring you to Christ. (I have observed that Christians are really really uncomfortable with atheists such that they would rather you confess that you're anything-- anything! Even Wiccan!-- besides an atheist.)
So good luck, and keep yout door locked! |
| Edited by - Cuneiformist on 05/28/2004 13:35:41 |
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Randy
SFN Regular
USA
1990 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 14:16:10 [Permalink]
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| Tell 'em you're a Druid, reformed. That usually gets a perplexed expression in return as they walk away. |
"We are all connected; to each other biologically, to the earth chemically, to the rest of the universe atomically."
"So you're made of detritus [from exploded stars]. Get over it. Or better yet, celebrate it. After all, what nobler thought can one cherish than that the universe lives within us all?"
-Neil DeGrasse Tyson |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 14:41:27 [Permalink]
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Do not let the turkey get past the first sentence. The instant that you see that Bible, say politely, "No thank you." and close the door. Arguing with them is time-consuming and in the end, futile. And it makes them a lot harder to get rid of. Unless, of course, you want to argue.
I doubt that I need to tell you to never let them into your house.
If they persist, knocking on the door again, threaten them with the cops. If they still don't take the hint, try and get their license plate number, then call those cops. You don't have to put up with that shit. It's a gross invasion of your privatcy.
Me, I'm big enough and ugly enough that they leave at the, "No thank you."
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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| Edited by - filthy on 05/28/2004 14:43:24 |
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 15:44:34 [Permalink]
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quote:
Then he tried the one about either I believed the Bible or I believed in Big Bang Theory.
Tell them the Pope has approved the Big Bang theory. (He has, in fact, done so)
quote:
Does anyone have any advice for what I can say next time one of these Tweedle Dees knock on my door?
Well, I can tell you what I have done in the past.... haven't had one come to my door in a long time now...
Once, there was a group of 3 mormon missionaries that tried to convert me over. They started in with their nonsense, I just stared at the one of them (the one that looked like the youngest of the three) and never spoke a word. They ask questions, I just lept staring. Finally, the guy stops and says... "Why are you staring at him like that?" I said, "You want me to be a mormon?" They said, "Yes....", I said, "Ok, but only if I can have him." and pinted at the one I was staring at. They left.....
Another time was a jehova's witness. I lit up a stoagie and stood close enough to him that I was inside his personal space.... blew some smoke in his face, and kept stepping closer when he would back away a bit....
Now, if your me (6'1", 275lb, short hair and goatee) this works for getting rid of them. For a woman, I'd reccomend just shutting the door in their face. If they persist, 911 and tell the operator your being threatened. |
Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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ConsequentAtheist
SFN Regular
641 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 16:44:47 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Huluhae
What gets me is that he stood on my porch for 20 mins., ...
All by himself? |
For the philosophical naturalist, the rejection of supernaturalism is a case of "death by a thousand cuts." -- Barbara Forrest, Ph.D. |
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Dave W.
Info Junkie
USA
26022 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 21:27:34 [Permalink]
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| An old roommate of mine had no shame whatsoever, and spent a good deal of time nude. He took, without anyone asking him, the "weekend door-answering job," as he would answer the door stark naked, and if the person knocking happened to be a missionary of any sort, he'd offer a straight trade: their pamphlets, tracts, or whatever information they had, in return for my roommate's copy of the "Satanic Bible" (if anyone's seen that, what's it say? I was uninterested, and never looked at it). The folks who knocked usually left in less time than it took for my roommate to offer the deal. |
- Dave W. (Private Msg, EMail)
Evidently, I rock!
Why not question something for a change?
Visit Dave's Psoriasis Info, too. |
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rickm
Skeptic Friend
Canada
109 Posts |
Posted - 05/28/2004 : 22:41:25 [Permalink]
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I read the satanic bible when I was younger, theres not anything really bad as one would expect. Much of it is how to live in a way that most people already live today Christians included. Some things I remember, don't waste your love on people who do not reciprocate, save it for the people who are deserving of your love. Don't turn the other cheek. Sex is something that the satanitst should revel in, sex is such an important act that it should never be performed with an unwilling partner, no rape, no bestiality, it must be consentual.
Anton Zsander Lavey never condoned any acts of violence, no baby sacrifices and such. After reading the book I wondered how it related to satanism at all, if we take satanism as described by christians.
Basically the book was crap.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
-- Woody Allen, Without Feathers, 1975 |
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Ricky
SFN Die Hard
USA
4907 Posts |
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Huluhae
New Member
16 Posts |
Posted - 05/30/2004 : 21:20:06 [Permalink]
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| Good tips, everyone. I 'preciate 'em. |
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Roki
New Member
5 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2004 : 03:39:01 [Permalink]
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Just tell the next Tweedle Dee that Tweedle Dum already came and talked to you about it. Then say in an apologetic tone "Oh dear I guess you all don't keep track of who you have visited, sorry for wasting your time *smile*"
Look at the time
"I have to go now I'm busy with something"
Close the door. |
It was determined that I would believe in determinism |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2004 : 04:19:54 [Permalink]
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I live in a small, rural community with several churchs fairly close by, including one of my personal favorites, a Primitive Baptist Church. In a good year, I can usually expect a couple visits from the double-dipped-in-deep-water folks.
The ones that know me no longer bother (and indeed, some few are friends). The ones that don't seldom revisit. Perhaps the ratty, old Harley in the yard, the long hair and untrimmed beard, and the tattoos have something to do with it.
Or maybe they just tire easily? 
It is best to stop them before they get started because once they hit their stride, getting rid of them with any degree dignety is impossible. These people work at it.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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| Edited by - filthy on 05/31/2004 04:23:00 |
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Renae
SFN Regular
543 Posts |
Posted - 05/31/2004 : 08:17:33 [Permalink]
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My advice as a chick: get in touch with your Inner Bitch (and we all know we have one, right?) It works for me. I've never had one, Jehova Witness or otherwise, proseltyze me for more than about 30 seconds.
I shock people sometimes 'cause I'm 5'3" and 110 pounds of sweetness and light...except when I'm NOT.  |
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Vic Daring
New Member
49 Posts |
Posted - 06/01/2004 : 09:48:22 [Permalink]
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Someone on another forum once offered a great line for these situations.
Just smile sweetly and say, "Oh, I'm sorry. I don't give a damn about Jesus."
I haven't had the chance to try it yet, but I can't wait! |
The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed. |
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chaloobi
SFN Regular
1620 Posts |
Posted - 06/01/2004 : 10:06:42 [Permalink]
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quote:
Originally posted by Huluhae
<snip>
Anyhow, I hate this is so long. Does anyone have any advice for what I can say next time one of these Tweedle Dees knock on my door?
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Happy Memorial Day to Everyone!
Advice:
Close the door in his face. If you wish to be polite, as I do, you smile, say "No thank you" and then close the door in his face. |
-Chaloobi
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