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Zandermann
Skeptic Friend
USA
431 Posts |
 Posted - 08/30/2001 : 18:41:29 [Permalink]
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PhDreamer: I obviously don't know the young lady in question, so I can only speak in generalities.
All I wanted to say above is that the term "soulmate" as it is used today (among adolescents and adults alike) doesn't always carry a religious connotation.
As others have said before me, the concept itself is fishy in the extreme. I'm just dubious that its application always implies a 'spiritual' component.
"If in the last few years you haven't discarded a major opinion or acquired a new one, check your pulse. You may be dead." |
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ljbrs
SFN Regular
USA
842 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2001 : 16:33:36 [Permalink]
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PHDreamer:
Perhaps the girl does not want to go to college. Average high school grades do not give a proper preparation for excellent universities. This girl was brought up by the wrong family and in a religious atmosphere. She did not have a chance to begin with. The flaky thinking which comes from a severe religious upbringing does not lead a female to success in life. Or a male, for that matter.
It is sad for you to have to watch the work you put into this athlete go down the drain. She is simply gone (of her own doing). Get to work on the next athlete. Things might be better this time. But, watch out for the home background. It deletes ability every time. Such religions want their females to be dutiful, self-effacing, ignorant, and stupid. The females select men who desire such self-denigration. Losers, all... Very, very sad...
ljbrs 
*Nothing is more damaging to a new truth than an old error.* Goethe |
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 09/03/2001 : 22:24:49 [Permalink]
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No ljbrs, a person can break from their background! My Dad is a good example. He's from, (I won't sugarcoat this), white trash. At 14 or 15, he took a look at his family and saw them for what they were. Stupid, dirty, illiterate, and ignorant. He left. While still in school, he slept in people's barns and did odd jobs for meals. At 17 he left high school and joined the Navy. He went from E-1 to O-4, and got his college degree after he retired. Guess what he did then? From the two school systems he was in, I've heard he was the best elementary school teacher they'd ever seen.
He's told me he could have taken the easy road, stayed where he was and gone with the flow, but he wanted more. I hope this young lady breaks with her tradition and tries to make a go of it. Dad says people in his hometown treat him a little weird when he goes home, but to him, it was all worth it. She has to take the long view and decide what's really important to her.
Lisa
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bestonnet_00
Skeptic Friend
Australia
358 Posts |
Posted - 09/04/2001 : 00:47:32 [Permalink]
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Not many people do break free of their background. To do so requires one to be able to decide they want to leave and have the courage to do so.
Very few people decide to leave and I would be willing to say there aren't many of them with the courage to do so.
Radioactive GM Crops.
Slightly above background.
Safe to eat.
But no activist would dare rip it out.
As they think it gives them cancer. |
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ljbrs
SFN Regular
USA
842 Posts |
Posted - 10/11/2001 : 18:45:01 [Permalink]
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On the other hand you can grow up in a family full of geniuses. It is very difficult trying to be normal. In the long run, the family wins out, and nerdism becomes one's personal signature.
That was difficult to escape. Everybody in my family had university degrees. Attaining advanced degrees was a goal I simply had to meet if I was to be a respected part of my family. Everything we did was expected to be first-rate. It was really a heavy yoke to bear. One misses out on a lot of things....
ljbrs <(;~)-
*Nothing is more damaging to a new truth than an old error.* Goethe
Edited by - ljbrs on 10/11/2001 18:47:29 |
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Kristin
Skeptic Friend
Canada
84 Posts |
Posted - 10/15/2001 : 08:59:42 [Permalink]
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quote:
They're what, 18 or 19? I'm inclined to think they're confusing spirituality with hormones. After you've calmed down a bit, put it to her this way: if she's really, truly in love, one little year won't make a difference. 12 months. 365 days.
Going OT here, but that is a very hurtful opinion you're expressing there. My aunt, whose opinion I once valued highly, made a snide comment about my ex shortly after I broke up with him: "That wasn't love, dear, that was lust." We were in Costco. I started bawling. Lovely, hmm? Unless you are arguing that 'love' is merely hormones, which would be a valid standpoint, I suppose.
I think that the quality of love has been argued to not be dependant on the age of the participants. One may quite simply not be cognizant of all the factors involved at a younger age.
sidenote: I didn't go to university, partly because of my ex. If I had, I wouldn't have met my fiance. Hormones can't be argued for this case, as I only see him every 6 months. I'm 21. I do not believe in soulmates. I also think the subject line is asinine. Not much can 'make' a person stupid outside of substance abuse or physical trauma (or arguably, the opposite sex. Or the same sex. You get the idea.) I appreciate, however, that the OP is irked by this foolish behavior.
Good judgement comes from experience: experience comes from bad judgement. |
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Lisa
SFN Regular
USA
1223 Posts |
Posted - 10/16/2001 : 13:34:54 [Permalink]
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How is this hurtful? If they're truly in love at 18 or 19, they'll still be in love at 22. Instead of giving education a chance, this young lady wants to jump into marriage because she's "in love". Wonderful. It may very well be she is in love. In which case a few years won't make a bit of difference because they'll end up together anyway.
I don't know the young lady in question, but I do have a couple of nieces only a few years younger. I'd ask them to consider very very carefully what they'd be trading that scholarship for. I realize that the entire font of mankind's wisdom is contained within those who are 14-18 years old, but I hope they'd listen at least a little.
Lisa
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PhDreamer
SFN Regular
USA
925 Posts |
Posted - 10/17/2001 : 08:34:30 [Permalink]
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I have a situation update, if anyone is interested. The player in question eventually ended up at the college in question and was struggling at first, understandably so. About 10 days ago, I was on a recruiting trip with a college coach friend at at junior college tournament in which her team was playing. I noticed she wasn't with the team. The coach told me she was in a severe car accident and is still in the hospital. It is not known whether she will ever play again or not.
As to my choice of topic title, I think this definition of 'dumb' allows its accurate usage in this case: "Conspicuously unintelligent; stupid"; referencing this definition of 'stupid': "Marked by a lack of intelligence or care; foolish or careless." I think the process of 'learning' things that are incorrect can be rephrased "mak[ing] you dumb." Your mileage may vary.
This signature does not exist. |
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ljbrs
SFN Regular
USA
842 Posts |
Posted - 10/17/2001 : 19:01:00 [Permalink]
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According to The American Heritage Dictionary, the word *dumb* means: *lacking the power of speech, mute; temporarily speechless with shock or fear; unwilling to speak; not producing or accompanied by speech or sound; {nautical): not self-propelling; (informal): stupid*. Most often, we hear the informal *stupid*, but the real meanings of the word have nothing to do with stupidity.
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Incidentally, there is nothing like *love* to overturn the best ideas. Males so often do not want their women to shine, particularly in sports, because they see it as less *feminine* for some ignorant reason.
ljbrs  
(Just being pedantic...)
*Nothing is more damaging to a new truth than an old error.* Goethe |
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Kristin
Skeptic Friend
Canada
84 Posts |
Posted - 10/19/2001 : 10:48:38 [Permalink]
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Lisa, I commented that it seemed hurtful as it can read as 'you aren't really in love, it's just the sex' when you mention spirituality vs. hormones. I do agree with your POV as expressed in the latter post (first hand knowledge) Thought the anecdote would make that clear, if not, apologies.
PhDreamer: if dumb = stupid.
Stupid can mean either 'lacking in intelligence' or 'foolish'. I usually use the latter word when referring to a foolishness. Stupid I do take as meaning 'lacking in intelligence'.
in·tel·li·gence (n-tl-jns)
n.
The capacity to acquire and apply knowledge.
[snip]
And so. Semantics, anyone? ;)
Details aside, I am sorry to hear what has happened to her, and send hope that she recovers fully.
Good judgement comes from experience: experience comes from bad judgement. |
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PhDreamer
SFN Regular
USA
925 Posts |
Posted - 10/19/2001 : 11:58:16 [Permalink]
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quote:
PhDreamer: if dumb = stupid.
Stupid can mean either 'lacking in intelligence' or 'foolish'. I usually use the latter word when referring to a foolishness. Stupid I do take as meaning 'lacking in intelligence'.
in·tel·li·gence (n-tl-jns)
n.
The capacity to acquire and apply knowledge.
[snip]
And so. Semantics, anyone? ;)
Oh good grief. If it really matters that much, I profoundly apologize for using the word 'dumb' euphemistically. Sometimes I am such a dumb-ass.
quote:
Details aside, I am sorry to hear what has happened to her, and send hope that she recovers fully.
Thank you. She is the type of person who needs others' approval so if I tell her there are others who care at all about her health, it will likely make her feel better. She's a little depressed right now, as you might imagine.
This signature does not exist. |
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ZaphodBeeblebrox
Skeptic Friend
USA
117 Posts |
Posted - 10/19/2001 : 12:54:49 [Permalink]
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quote:
Maybe she's scared that if she gets a good education she will lose her belief in god.
She wouldn't be the First.
That reminds me, how about a new Survivor Show, called Evolution in Action. Basically, you take a bunch of Bible-Belters, give them the basics on the Theory of Natural Selection, and then put them on an Island with a limited Food Supply. Last one to resort to Cannibalism, wins. Once and for all, we'll see if Spirituallity, does indeed make you Dumb.
If you Ignore Your Rights, they WILL, go away.
Edited by - ZaphodBeeblebrox on 10/19/2001 12:57:08
Edited by - ZaphodBeeblebrox on 10/19/2001 12:58:04 |
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James
SFN Regular
USA
754 Posts |
Posted - 10/19/2001 : 18:35:18 [Permalink]
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quote:
quote:
Maybe she's scared that if she gets a good education she will lose her belief in god.
She wouldn't be the First.
That reminds me, how about a new Survivor Show, called Evolution in Action. Basically, you take a bunch of Bible-Belters, give them the basics on the Theory of Natural Selection, and then put them on an Island with a limited Food Supply. Last one to resort to Cannibalism, wins. Once and for all, we'll see if Spirituallity, does indeed make you Dumb.
How much you wanna bet that after the food is gone, they'll turn to god to save them and they all die of starvation?
Prayer is nothing more than "spiritual masturbation". -theatheistknight |
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