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Kil
Evil Skeptic
USA
13481 Posts |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
 Posted - 12/08/2004 : 08:45:00 [Permalink]
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Here's Landover Baptist's take on the matter:
quote:
The Devil Is In Your Chimney!
Is Santa Claus, Satan? (A Special Report Concerning the Origin of Santa Claus)
Freehold, Iowa - Satan's evil plan has created jobs for hundreds of thousands of old lecherous pedophiles throughout this Godly country every December. These filthy homeless hobos just lay on their urine-stained cardboard beds 11 months out of the year, dreaming of Christmas when they can drunkenly traipse into the warmth of departments stores and have innocent little Christian children sit on their vermin-infested laps. Unwary parents happily snap pictures while Satan's obesely wheezing drunks ask their children whether they've been "bad" and whisper lewd suggestions in their angelic little ears with their filthy booze-breath and cigarette-discolored lips. How many unsuspecting tots have suffered a quick grope before Satan's little helper moves on to the next hopeful child in line?
Satan's foul, drunken and depraved, little helpers
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist! 
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Ricky
SFN Die Hard
USA
4907 Posts |
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byhisgrace88
Formerly "creation88"
USA
166 Posts |
Posted - 12/08/2004 : 23:29:45 [Permalink]
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Ya know if I didn't know any better I would think you were saying Santa was'nt real. What are you saying?!?! Do my PARENTS eat the cookies and milk I leave for Santa every Christmas Eve? You're crazy if you think the parents of the world could keep that up!
What's next; the tooth fairy??? She gave me a dollar, PLUS, I saw that she has an illigitimate love child with big foot. The black and white paper at the grocery store told me so.
Ok, seriously though. My parents never told me Santa Clause exsisted, because it takes away a childs thankfulness to whoever gave them the gift. Why buy you're kids presents, and have them thank some fat jolly fellow, who breeds reighndeer, at the north pole? Does'nt make sense to me. :) |
Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desire, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.-- C.S. Lewis |
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Dude
SFN Die Hard
USA
6891 Posts |
Posted - 12/08/2004 : 23:55:43 [Permalink]
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See, christians abuse their children by not letting them buy into the santa myth along with all the other kids!
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Ignorance is preferable to error; and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing, than he who believes what is wrong.
-- Thomas Jefferson
"god :: the last refuge of a man with no answers and no argument." - G. Carlin
Hope, n.
The handmaiden of desperation; the opiate of despair; the illegible signpost on the road to perdition. ~~ da filth |
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filthy
SFN Die Hard
USA
14408 Posts |
Posted - 12/10/2004 : 12:47:13 [Permalink]
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How many Santa's does it take to have a really good dustup?
quote:
Police called to a mass brawl found an army of Santas punching and kicking each other.
4000, actually.
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"What luck for rulers that men do not think." -- Adolf Hitler (1889 - 1945)
"If only we could impeach on the basis of criminal stupidity, 90% of the Rethuglicans and half of the Democrats would be thrown out of office." ~~ P.Z. Myres
"The default position of human nature is to punch the other guy in the face and take his stuff." ~~ Dude
Brother Boot Knife of Warm Humanitarianism,
and Crypto-Communist!
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walt fristoe
SFN Regular
USA
505 Posts |
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Topic Locked
